The ‘Ssup’ trend

Hello folks!

There are certain things that people say that really confuse me. I don’t understand how to respond. Kindly give me suggestions.

1) Those good old days are gone when we greeted each other saying ‘hi’.
Now it has changed to ‘SSUP’.
How should I respond?
Should I say, ‘a well developed ceiling which hopefully won’t fall on my head’ or ‘ a beautiful blue sky with birds flying around and shitting everywhere’.
( Saying ‘nothing much’ is too boring and makes me feel like a jobless loser)

2) When you have the option to end a conversation, I don’t know why people resort to using words such as ‘hmm’, ‘ohk’ and ‘ohh’ (with varying number of H) and lengthen it unnecessarily.

Disclaimer- Sanika Pandit has been influenced by people and has admitted to making both the mistakes above. She is taking efforts to curb these annoying habits. Kindly support her in the effort to curb this destruction of etiquettes and shoot the people who do so.